[Were Hierophant more of a Stand with its own conscious will, the way it was clinging to Kakyoin might have been seen as a silent apology to its user. But it wasn't, and if it was an apology it was one from Kakyoin to the people he cared about--I'm sorry for the way that I am. For the tone in Polnareff's voice when he'd confessed to having this power, for how he'd kept Jotaro up at night so many times this past week worrying over his stupid fears and nightmares, for whatever actually became of that school nurse and the kid who'd been stabbed with a pen. It had all been his fault, more than Kakyoin had already accepted it was.]
[He took a slow, careful breath to refocus, exactly as Caesar had taught him--god, Caesar didn't know. What would he say, would he look at Kakyoin like he was some kind of monster-]
['Family is first and forever, Noriaki.']
[...What was he thinking? Had he really done anything wrong here? If Fugo was right, then Kakyoin Tenmei and Hierophant Green's only crime was being a child who desperately wanted friends that understood him, and falling in with the wrong one once upon a time in Cairo.]
['You aren't the same as whatever monster is haunting your nightmares, Kakyoin.']
[He'd insisted to himself a thousand times over that the Dio in this city hadn't done anything yet. That he wasn't the same as that nightmare for it, and maybe he wouldn't be if he were given a chance--it wasn't his fault and he shouldn't be held accountable for it.]
[It wasn't his fault.]
['You've never used your Stand to hurt anyone who wasn't already trying to hurt you. I know you haven't, and I know you won't.']
['Evil is when you use the weak for your own gain and crush them under your foot', right? He still remembered that vividly in the blank spaces that were the months up to that day, and it was no less true now. Fugo was right about another thing--he was afraid of that power. That was 'evil' by definition. Kakyoin hadn't used it to take over anyone else's mind, and he never would again for exactly that reason.]
I- [He realized the silence had stretched on a little too long, and lowered a hand that had started mindlessly twisting in his hair at some point.] ...wanted friends. You're exactly right--I was never able to close that distance when I was a child, because no one fit what I saw as the criteria required for a person to understand me. Whenever we may have developed this ability in response to that--which I don't doubt may well have been the case--I never knew about it until I'd been mind controlled myself.
[And yet here he was now; in a house full of his dearest friends and people he called 'family'. People who finally saw Kakyoin for the person he and Hierophant were together, and knew that was someone worth caring about.]
['You don't have to earn that. You don't have to fight to keep it. It's already yours, no matter what.']
[He wondered what that lonely child would have thought, to know this would be his future.]
...damn, if this is what it feels like to have someone evaluate you based on your Stand then I need to be a little more careful. I never realized how strange it really felt to have someone else look at Hierophant similar to the way I do. [A small, awkward smile broke out across his face, silently assuring Fugo that he hadn't gone too far or crossed any line.]
no subject
[He took a slow, careful breath to refocus, exactly as Caesar had taught him--god, Caesar didn't know. What would he say, would he look at Kakyoin like he was some kind of monster-]
['Family is first and forever, Noriaki.']
[...What was he thinking? Had he really done anything wrong here? If Fugo was right, then Kakyoin Tenmei and Hierophant Green's only crime was being a child who desperately wanted friends that understood him, and falling in with the wrong one once upon a time in Cairo.]
['You aren't the same as whatever monster is haunting your nightmares, Kakyoin.']
[He'd insisted to himself a thousand times over that the Dio in this city hadn't done anything yet. That he wasn't the same as that nightmare for it, and maybe he wouldn't be if he were given a chance--it wasn't his fault and he shouldn't be held accountable for it.]
[It wasn't his fault.]
['You've never used your Stand to hurt anyone who wasn't already trying to hurt you. I know you haven't, and I know you won't.']
['Evil is when you use the weak for your own gain and crush them under your foot', right? He still remembered that vividly in the blank spaces that were the months up to that day, and it was no less true now. Fugo was right about another thing--he was afraid of that power. That was 'evil' by definition. Kakyoin hadn't used it to take over anyone else's mind, and he never would again for exactly that reason.]
I- [He realized the silence had stretched on a little too long, and lowered a hand that had started mindlessly twisting in his hair at some point.] ...wanted friends. You're exactly right--I was never able to close that distance when I was a child, because no one fit what I saw as the criteria required for a person to understand me. Whenever we may have developed this ability in response to that--which I don't doubt may well have been the case--I never knew about it until I'd been mind controlled myself.
[And yet here he was now; in a house full of his dearest friends and people he called 'family'. People who finally saw Kakyoin for the person he and Hierophant were together, and knew that was someone worth caring about.]
['You don't have to earn that. You don't have to fight to keep it. It's already yours, no matter what.']
[He wondered what that lonely child would have thought, to know this would be his future.]
...damn, if this is what it feels like to have someone evaluate you based on your Stand then I need to be a little more careful. I never realized how strange it really felt to have someone else look at Hierophant similar to the way I do. [A small, awkward smile broke out across his face, silently assuring Fugo that he hadn't gone too far or crossed any line.]