[And he is, sneaking into the library as quietly as he can and pulling a chair over to the table so that he can curl up on it right next to Kakyoin, toes hooked over the rung.]
Chariot reflects him well--he's a knight in shining armor. Polnareff is a very good and kind person. I, however, am not.
So while I understand where he's coming from in a way only the two of us can, he probably can't quite grasp the matter in more than black and white terms.
He was still like that when I knew him, just . . . he understood the need for in-between-ness a little better. Didn't always like it, but he understood.
I feel bad. Because he was trying so hard, and I was going to just let it be, but he said he wanted to know what I meant. So I had to explain it to him, and now I'm worried that the more he thinks about it, the less he'll want to do with me. Sometimes I still don't understand why you want anything to do with me.
Because I like you. I don't need more of a reason than that. [He shrugged again, like that was just obvious.]
I've always known him to be painfully obtuse, but not the type to really push people away. Not like that, at least. And if he tries, correcting him loudly and elbowing him in the face usually makes him see reason pretty clearly.
[I like you. I don't need more of a reason than that.]
[It's stupid. He knows that. But it's just . . .]
[His expression crumples a little.]
He just looked so disappointed, when I explained. It felt like I should have just let him stay how he was, believing I was — whatever he thought I was. He liked me fine like that.
I don't know. I think so? But I don't want him to be sad, either.
I don't know why I feel so strongly about it. I don't with you or Jotaro; there's not this need to protect you, because I know you can protect yourselves, but — I've seen what happens to him. I want so much for him not to hurt, not ever.
I know. [Speaking of being protective...Kakyoin put his other arm around Giorno's shoulders, delicately tangling his fingers in blond hair.] I want to protect him, too.
But if you want my opinion...I think it's better for him to get to know you as yourself, the way Jojo and I both do. Maybe it won't be easy on any side, but wouldn't that be preferable to acting like something you aren't?
[The change in him shows immediately, the way he takes so much comfort from the simple gesture of fingers in his hair. It makes him sigh and close his eyes, push himself as close as he can get.]
It would. I know. I just want one easy thing, that's all, and it seemed so easy for a while. I know it's stupid.
If it is, then I think we can be excused for being stupid once in a while. Stupid teenagers do stupid things, right?
[Every so often, Kakyoin had a recurring thought to the tune of holy shit we're just teenagers and it never ceased to be a little alarming.]
But you can trust me when I say it'll work out somehow.
[It was right about then that Hierophant came back and carefully set two cups of coffee on the table before coiling loosely around Giorno's hand rather than his user's.]
[That's right. They're still stupid teenagers. He forgets, too — all the time.]
[It worries him for half a second. But then Hierophant's wrapped around his fingers, and he's safe. He knows he's safe, with Hierophant and Kakyoin close. So he lifts his hand and kisses Hierophant before burying his face in Kakyoin's shoulder again, perfectly content.]
You'd never lie to me. Not even to make me feel better. I love that about you.
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Date: 2016-04-05 06:07 am (UTC)I'll be right down.
[And he is, sneaking into the library as quietly as he can and pulling a chair over to the table so that he can curl up on it right next to Kakyoin, toes hooked over the rung.]
Hi.
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Date: 2016-04-05 06:12 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2016-04-05 06:13 am (UTC)[He leans against Kakyoin's shoulder, not really wanting to look at him right now.]
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Date: 2016-04-05 06:14 am (UTC)[Shrugging, he put his arm around Giorno's shoulders without hesitation and pulled him a little closer.]
...You okay?
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Date: 2016-04-05 06:17 am (UTC)[He sighs a little, hiding his face.]
Polnareff knows, now. About my — you know. I just got through talking to him.
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Date: 2016-04-05 06:19 am (UTC)[...oh. Okay. That was...a thing.]
How'd he take it?
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Date: 2016-04-05 06:23 am (UTC)[His voice is flat.]
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Date: 2016-04-05 06:26 am (UTC)Missing the point as usual, then. Typical.
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Date: 2016-04-05 06:28 am (UTC)He didn't mean to. But I don't think I was very nice to him. Not awful, just . . . I don't know.
Sometimes it's easier to be around you, because you don't want to act like I'm not what I am.
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Date: 2016-04-05 06:32 am (UTC)So while I understand where he's coming from in a way only the two of us can, he probably can't quite grasp the matter in more than black and white terms.
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Date: 2016-04-05 06:47 am (UTC)I feel bad. Because he was trying so hard, and I was going to just let it be, but he said he wanted to know what I meant. So I had to explain it to him, and now I'm worried that the more he thinks about it, the less he'll want to do with me. Sometimes I still don't understand why you want anything to do with me.
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Date: 2016-04-05 06:55 am (UTC)I've always known him to be painfully obtuse, but not the type to really push people away. Not like that, at least. And if he tries, correcting him loudly and elbowing him in the face usually makes him see reason pretty clearly.
no subject
Date: 2016-04-06 04:13 am (UTC)[It's stupid. He knows that. But it's just . . .]
[His expression crumples a little.]
He just looked so disappointed, when I explained. It felt like I should have just let him stay how he was, believing I was — whatever he thought I was. He liked me fine like that.
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Date: 2016-04-06 04:20 am (UTC)Don't you think it would be better for him to get to know you as you are, rather than what he might think you are?
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Date: 2016-04-06 04:25 am (UTC)I don't know why I feel so strongly about it. I don't with you or Jotaro; there's not this need to protect you, because I know you can protect yourselves, but — I've seen what happens to him. I want so much for him not to hurt, not ever.
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Date: 2016-04-06 04:37 am (UTC)But if you want my opinion...I think it's better for him to get to know you as yourself, the way Jojo and I both do. Maybe it won't be easy on any side, but wouldn't that be preferable to acting like something you aren't?
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Date: 2016-04-06 04:56 am (UTC)It would. I know. I just want one easy thing, that's all, and it seemed so easy for a while. I know it's stupid.
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Date: 2016-04-06 04:58 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2016-04-06 04:59 am (UTC)But if you say it'll be okay, then I believe you. I trust you.
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Date: 2016-04-06 05:03 am (UTC)[Every so often, Kakyoin had a recurring thought to the tune of holy shit we're just teenagers and it never ceased to be a little alarming.]
But you can trust me when I say it'll work out somehow.
[It was right about then that Hierophant came back and carefully set two cups of coffee on the table before coiling loosely around Giorno's hand rather than his user's.]
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Date: 2016-04-07 12:48 am (UTC)[It worries him for half a second. But then Hierophant's wrapped around his fingers, and he's safe. He knows he's safe, with Hierophant and Kakyoin close. So he lifts his hand and kisses Hierophant before burying his face in Kakyoin's shoulder again, perfectly content.]
You'd never lie to me. Not even to make me feel better. I love that about you.
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Date: 2016-04-07 01:04 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2016-04-07 02:28 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2016-04-07 02:29 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2016-04-07 02:58 am (UTC). . . I don't want to fight someone for real. But if we had to, and Jotaro wasn't there, or something. That's what I mean.
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